Battle Of Wheels (Update)

Hey loves,

Last night while going through my nightly dinner time battle with Baby O I realized that I never updated you all on how things were going with Battle of Wheels.

So here it is...

At this stage in Baby O’s life she is absolutely a picky eater with a very strong opinion about food yet, loves to snack. When it comes to full meals either she loves what’s placed in front of her and will devour every last drop. In such a manner that you’d awesome she never ate before or, she HATES it and will run around the house or kitchen kicking and screaming if you try to convince her otherwise...smh.

The worse part about these dinner shenanigans are the fact that they are very inconsistent. One day chicken is broccoli works and the next day it doesn’t. One day she wants it because mommy and daddy are eating it but, the moment you thing you’re going to give it to her again hunty acts all sorts of brand new on you lol.

That’s her play cooking her dinner from last night (aka feeding it to the dog) because, she didn’t want to eat. Mind you this is the exact same chicken breast she ate of off her dad’s fork the night before...I can’t deal

Although, I can laugh about all this in hindsight, I am very aware that in the moment this is/can be a frustrating ordeal. Especially when I pick her up from school the next day and her daily charts says she ate all her food. I totally go all...Huh? What the heck are they doing that I’m not? What the heck is in their food? Then I have to remind myself that kids are influenced by those around them and everyone else is sitting and eating like a big kid she will as well. I can’t lie that little fact annoys the heck out me but, I try to turn my annoyance into gratitude because in the grand scheme of things she atleast she gets in one balanced meal a day.

As, for our nightly battle I’ve learned to no longer fight with her about it.  I try to avoid force feeding her and instead I take the approach of this is your only option. If she chooses to eat it great, if not I’ve learned to be ok with that too.Especially, after I recently received this article in my inbox...Picky Toddler Eating. It gave me a ton of perspective and, taught me to trust her judgment when it comes to this food thing. After all she knows her body best :).

Fellow HeartBEATS

Is your toddler a picky eater as well? What are some of the things you’re doing to resolve the issue?

Little Miss Personality

Happy Monday Loves!

My apologies for going all MIA last week but I spent the week diligently working on another project (will share details soon) and by the time I came up for air it was the weekend lol.

Any who. I'm back like I never left and ready to share some updates. 

Baby O is officially 16 months and although there aren’t any major milestones to share there are some silent developments taking place.

What’s a silent development?

To me it’s the subtle changes that show growth that we often take advantage of. The ones we see but happening daily but because it’s not crawling, walking, or talking we don’t feel the need to share.

For instance my tiny tot has TONS of personality and I swear it crept up on us.

Honestly it didn’t I’ve been watching it develop since birth and, have been living a life of denial about it lol. And, now that she’s a little mover and shaker I can no longer hide the fact that I know which is cool...I guess. Because, at the moment the real question is what in the world am I going to do with her little strong, independent, determined, loving, and funny self? I totally didn’t expect all this at 16 months.

Adrienne & Kevin's Battle Against Infertility

Hey luvs!

I’m not sure about you all but this National Infertility Awareness Week mini-serious has been very informative and emotional for me. These journeys are real, the courage is remarkable, and the strength the couples have shown is just...Unbelievable. I’m beyond grateful that Life With An External HeartBEAT was able to share their stories with you all. After all, they too are living life with heartbeats theirs are just the kind we like to call angels:).

With that being said, I thought it would be best to end this mini-serious on a high note by sharing this powerful video I received from a former co-peep and his wife who were triumphant in their battle against infertility. I remember their struggle like it was yesterday, so this video truly made my heart smile and brought tears to my eyes. Knowing their hearts I found the message to be very motivational as I know things worked out exactly how they were meant to be for them. 

Enjoy...

Follow Up from Kevin...

The “ironic” thing about this is that right after we did this we got a call the very next week from Jacob’s birth-mother and were blessed with two wonderful birth-parents that we’ve had a great relationship with in an open adoption. we finalized on 12/17 on the day we both sold our townhouse and bought the home we moved into in Jan (talk about blessings).

Fellow HeartBEATS

If nothing else I hope that this series has been enlightening for you all by,making you more aware of what the families struggling with infertility is going through. For those of you that are already parents I hope these testimonies have brought you closer to your children.

Nina's Battle Against Infertility

Happy Monday Loves!

National Infertility Awareness Week ended on the 26^th, but after sharing Amanda’s story I received another story that is near and dear to my heart so I just had to share with you all. I’ve known the couple you are about to meet since my freshmen year of high school, yet it wasn’t until I started this blog that I realized they had their own battle with infertility. From the outside looking in their marriage has a solid foundation, and appears that they are the perfect couple. You see them and think they are the cutest couple ever because the bond between them radiates and you know they have the kind of love people dream about.

So how could it be that they too have suffered from infertility? Find out now by reading their journey below...

My Testimony 

Hi. My name is Nina G. of Finding Joy inFertility and I am looking forward to sharing my Infertility journey with you all. I have enjoyed reading Sheena’s blog and Facebook posts about baby O. I appreciate her honesty, her sense of humor, and her vulnerability at times. I recently contacted Sheena in regards to possibly starting a blog of my own in the hopes of sharing my Infertility journey. After talking things over with my husband, who is very private, he told me that if sharing our journey helped me to heal my broken heart then he was all for it. Yes, I felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest and beaten into tiny little pieces. In other words, I was hurting in silence and refused to allow this pain to consume me. I knew that opening up and sharing would not be easy, but it would be worth it if I could help anyone who was going though a journey of their own. So here I am, ready to share with you my journey of Infertility during National Infertility Awareness Week.

The Beginning

My husband and I started dating when I was in the 9^th grade. We literally grew up together. We decided to get married in December of 2004, four years after I graduated high school. Through difficult times and struggles we always had each other. We would talk about starting a family and becoming parents, but we never imagined that it would be the hardest thing our relationship and marriage would face. Infertile couples are three times more likely to divorce. Sometimes, the void of not having a child causes so much damage and strain on the relationship that the couple decides to end it. Thankfully, our story did not end in divorce. The pressure placed on a woman of child-bearing age can also take a toll on you when no one knows that you have started trying and nothing seems to be happening. Early on in our journey, one of my biggest fears was that my youngest cousin would have a child before I did. Well, now she has two children and I am the only one in my immediate family sitting here childless. I’m far from bitter, it just hurts a little every time that it is not me who is sharing good news. I didn’t understand why this was happening to me. I tried to do things the “right” way. I was married to my best friend, I graduated with my Bachelors degree in Nursing, and I had a career working as a Pediatric nurse. My menstrual cycles were normal, we were both healthy. I just did not understand and started to tell myself that I must have done something wrong, some how it had to be my fault. I felt like I was being punished by God. Every time I thought that I was pregnant and my period came I cried, every child’s party that I was overlooked made me sad, every Mother’s Day I spent without a child I cried. Still, I hid behind a smile and no one knew how bad I was hurting inside. I felt like I was slowly dying. I felt like if I could just be a mom I would not care if I had the latest clothes, the nicest car, or any materialistic things. I could have been stripped down to nothing and I would have been overjoyed with someone simply calling me mommy. Oh how my heart yearns to hear those words. I think I cried so much and so often that my husband almost became numb to it. It almost became a part of who I was. He probably expected me to cry because I did so very often. So we knew that we would have to seek help in trying to find a solution to our problem.

Thanks for reading and don't forget to come back tomorrow to find out if there's a solution for Nina and her hubby

Battle Of Wheels

I'm sure from this title you thought this article would be about Olivia and her little hot wheels. Ummmm it's not, but check this photo the hubs got of her in her ride couple of Sundays ago.

Now, the main purpose of today’s blog, in my house there is a real battle of WILLs going down.

I’ve finally realized that Baby O is whole heartedly a toddler and has really be trying my patience. Yeah we have some... She tried it (in my Tamara voice) moments.  The crazy part is I didn't realize that’s what she was doing until I was chatting with my friend Amber, about some of my recent dinner time experiences with Baby O. Over the past couple weeks the shenanigans at dinner time have simply been getting out of control. Of course, I blamed teething (because I blame everything on teething lol) but in reality she was pulling these stunts, because she knew she could. Talking to Amber helped me realize what was going on though.

But, I honestly wasn’t 100% convinced that she was playing me until I arrived at her school that same day. When I arrived to pick her up from school her teacher informed me that Baby O is learning to self sooth in the classroom. Of course, I inquired to see what self-soothing technique they were using, turns out when my tiny tot gets upset they walk her over to a little plush chair, explain to her that all is well, she has her moment and comes out when she’s ready to play again.

So my child gets the concept of time out? Really?

You better believe I left the school in total shock. Home girl listens to everyone but me lol (it's not funny but it is)...

For the first time in a long time I was the soft one. Totally thought I left that ish back in my childhood with my rough a** brothers. Guess I was wrong because home girl be punking me y'all. That night at dinner I put some base in my voice when speaking to her, how about home girl ate her entire dinner...oh it's ON. Bet I won't be around here letting a tiny tot get over on me anymore. It's her will against mine, and she may have won a few battles, but I promise I'll win this war.

After all it's simply a matter of respect. Which is not optional in our house.

Fellow HeartBEATS

I'll keep you all posted on our little war but for now is like to know when you first discovered the Battle of Wills in your home?

Memory Lane: Winter ONEderland (Outfit)

Of all the post in this series this is by far the one I’m most excited to share. Not only do I love talking about my little diva fashions, but for the most part all her outfits turned out just as I expected. Yes I said all her outfitsJ.  Turned out she needed an outfit for the cake smash session, party, and her actual birthday. As I told you in my previous post we had a lot going on in one weekend, and of course being that she’s only a toddler I wanted to have several outfits in case things got messy with one or two of them along the way.  I didn’t want to waste my time fighting stains during a hectic weekend. When I’d much rather take that pressure off in that area and simply allow her to be free to enjoy herself, so momma had options on deck.

Cake Smash

Once I knew the theme for of the party I immediately emailed Baby O’s photographer Alana Marie Imagery (she is a beast, like serious I’m never disappointed with her work.) to book the cake smash session. I had already dropped the hint that I wanted to do one over the summer at our family 6 month photo shoot, but I needed to email her so she’d know I was serious, reserve our date, and start brainstorming on how the set would look. Emailing Alana got me super excited and directly after, I stayed up really late one sleepless night scouring one of my favorite sites for handmade items...Etsy.  When I first started my Etsy search I wasn’t quite sure what type of look I was going for, but very soon into it I found the perfect look via a site called lilabbehandmade. This site had the cutest little tutu sets I’d ever seen and trust having a daughter I had seen a ton lol. But, these were different and could be customized so no two were the sameJ. Talk about exclusive, It was perfect. After looking through all the designs the shop offered, and reading through some of their reviews, I immediately messaged them with a laundry list of questions.  Much to my surprise the owner Wendy responded promptly and we spent the rest of that night ironing out the details.  I felt so comfortable with her work and responses I wanted to see Baby O’s outfit right then and there lol. Unfortunately, that couldn’t happen as this shop was very high and demand and me placing my order in November only meant that I was guaranteed to receive it just a few days before the big photo shoot. Naturally the wait time had me nervous but I checked my nerves at the door because as I stated above...momma had options. When I received this outfit the week of Baby O’s photo session it was totally worth every dime I spent and all the anxiety had. Wendy had out done herself and I honestly couldn’t believe that she created such a masterpiece from just these few details...

Colors

Design 

 Final product photos

Party Outfit

Sometime after I had placed my order with Wendy for the cake smash look my friend Mariah launched her new online boutique Mariah’s Closet. Among the looks her designed was the most adorable little skater skirt she created for another toddler. I fell in love and just knew Baby O had to have it, so I texted her instantly to work out the details. We decided that an all-white leather skirt with purple accents on the bow was the way to go and I couldn’t have been happier with the decision.

However, I was a bit concerned when it came to the shirt selection.  Not only did I not know exactly what shirt I’d get to compliment the skirt, but I also had to ensure I selected the perfect white. I couldn’t have my little diva in all white attire that didn’t match, but not having seen the material before and how was I supposed to if my white would work.  In any case I knew I wanted to go with an oneies in order to prevent any wardrobe malfunctions and found the PERFECT one at H&M.  Well almost perfect. It was everything I was looking for but the bow tie color was off...grrrr. 

Being the innovative momma I am decide to switch it up and find some purple bows and buttons to replace the existing ones.  As always my dear friend Tabby helped me out by gifting me some left over bows she had made for her daughter. I excitedly took them, my new purple buttons, and the shirt to the cleaners and requested a shirt up grade lol. The final product was everything I’d hope it would be :)

With most of her party look complete the only thing left for me to worry about was her shoes. I’m a firm believer that the shoes you wear makes your outfit so I had to make sure hers were awesome. Unfortunately, for me she has some tiny little feet so most cute little girl shoes don’t come in her size, and I was left with only one option...tennis shoes. How in the world I was going to make this preppy look work with a pair of tennis shoes was a mystery until a friend randomly tagged me in a Instagram boutique that customize chuck Taylors.  The designs were awesome so I thought it was the perfect route to go until I seen their prices. There was just no way I was going to pay over $150 for a pair of kid shoes. So I decided to make defining her shoes another labor of love for the party and DIY them (tutorial coming soon). After a few failed test runs I figured out the perfect formula and got it right.

Inspiration

Test

Final

With Baby O’s cake smash outfit and her planned attire for the party complete she was all set. Although, due to the material of her custom skater skirt it was a bit heavier than expected. So to ensure she had the best time playing at her party she had a little outfit change half way through her Winter ONEderlamd affair. Which, all her guest seemed to love and made my heart smile because she got some good use out of all her looks. 

First Look

Second Look

Memory Lane: Winter ONEderland (Decor)

Hey Luvs!

As I mentioned in my previous post Tabby, Zion, Baby O, and I left the venue not only loving it but chatting it up about how to decorate the space. Of course being the planner that I am, I already spotted various elements I wanted to have at the party. My muse became a great source of inspiration by the way she transformed her lovely home into an amazingly elegant winter onderland affair but, I wanted to make Baby O's party a little more fun. Keeping the focus on the kiddies I had planned an all-white affair with pops of color like...fuchsia, turquoise, and purple.  I had seen a winter onederland themed party in these colors and although it didn't translate as well as my muse the color combo was simply beautiful.

Color inspiration

One day while out shopping at Wal-Mart I decided to venture over to the Christmas section for snowflake inspiration. OMG!!! They had so many I loved in all the right colors. How in the world was I going to contain myself? Thankfully I had a budget that I wanted/needed to stay under and decorating restrictions from my venue. This ultimately left me with the decision to choose the elements that provided with the best bang for my buck. While at the venue the night I booked it, Tabby and I had taken measurements of the classroom boards so I'd know exactly how much space there was to cover and the amount of supplies we needed.  I carefully selected each item based on its place in the room. Using the photos of the venue Tabby and I took with our phones...I was able to see the dream and plan for proper execution. Although, I didn't buy anything that day I did leave Wal-Mart with a few key photos. Yet, had a plan in place to do a little more research and confirm with the Hubs that the funds were available.

Here are some of the items I considered

Over the next few days I did a ton of research on the cost of the products I had seen. When I look back on it I spent a lot of time focusing on the decor but it was worth it. After determining Wal-Mart was the best place to purchase most of my décor. I went back to the store, politely sat on their floor in the Christmas aisle, and designed a mock up. Once I could see my vision coming to fruition I decided to purchase with the intent to return. I see the side eyes, so let me go ahead and explain the purchase with the intent to return comment. Since these items were seasonal I knew the day after Christmas they'd go on sale, and being the bargain shopper I am, my plan was to buy now and take them back later. That way I’d have what I wanted and also get the 50% off. Oh honey believe I didn't when I did (I don't care if I'm the richest person in the world. I won't ever be above a good deal lol), I actually wish I could have waited until after Christmas to purchase my items but they were a hot commodity. In any case I could check those Wal-Mart purchases off my list and spend the rest of my time focusing on the small but significant details that would make up the spaces below...

My in store mock up

The Entry Way/Photo Op

Looking back through the photos of the venue I realized that the entry way would be the first thing Baby O’s guest seen when they entered the reception area.  I then noticed that it had sort of a dramatic flare to it since everyone had to turn the corner to actually get in the room where the food and everything was. Oh! I had to play this up, I found a picture and tutorial on pinterest of some beautiful paper snowflakes that I knew would work perfect in this area.  Once I described them to my planning partner in crime Tabby she explained that she had done them before for a work shindig and agreed to take on the task of putting them to together for the party.   She is beyond a crafty mama so I not only trusted that she’d get them done, but I also knew she’d ensure they were perfect.  I picked up a ream of colorful paper from staples and handed it over to her without a care in the world :).

Entry

My inspirtaion

Progress photo from Tabby

Entry way anchor (I got these beautiful sparkaly trees from Home Goods and plan to use them in my Christmas decor this year)

Kiddie Table

Keeping the focus of this party on Baby O and her tiny tot friends I wanted to ensure that they not only had a play area that catered to them but, an area to enjoy their food at in which they felt comfortable.  I always get a kick of walking up to Baby O’s classroom at snack time, and seeing her and the other kiddies sitting at their little table munching on their snacks. It’s seriously one the cutest thing I’ve ever seen and I’m sure they totally feel all grown up lol. So I decided to create a similar set up at her party using a few portable tables (the table I used has adjustable height and I just set it at the lowest) that we have at the house and I rented chairs from local vendor. Of course, the event planner in me says no table is complete without the proper tablescape, so linen (borrowed from Tabby stash) and centerpieces were definitely in order. While out shopping for the day after Christmas I found the perfect snowman centerpieces for the table. I was already stalking my local target for these adorable snowman sippy cups I had seen to go on sale. But when they did I almost had a heart attack, because I made it to my target to late, I called Tabby and alerted her about this state of emergency as I rushed over to the other target by my home only to find they were out of stock too. I drove back home feeling defeated that the cups I had envisioned holding the kiddies drinks this entire time was sold out. Only for my boo Tabby to call saying her target had them and she picked up every last one they had...YES. With that out the way the kiddie table was almost complete, and the only thing left to do was stop by party city and grab their tiny plates.

Wrapping paper

Snowman

Layout on Table

The infamous sippy cups

My redesign and added personalization

Centerpieces

Looking at my muse photos I fell in love with the manzanite branch centerpieces she put together.  But, I also knew they cost more than I wanted to pay for centerpieces (based on my previous wedding planning experience and the vendor list she posted). So I was in the market for alternatives that we not only just as beautiful but also made a statement. Tabby had some a couple 20in vases leftover vases from our wedding planning days that she was more than happy to let me borrow (I secretly think she wanted them out of her beautiful new home), so she built the centerpieces based on using those jars. While, out and about at Michael’s she noticed they had some of their beautiful branches on sale and suggested I go check them out to see if I could use then for the party. Needless to say I headed there the same day and some metallic silver and oh so glittery ones. I handed them over to Tabby sho had found the perfect purple vase filler while thrifting and she created a masterpiece. Unfortunately, the supplies we had only yielded one centerpiece so I needed to find something else for the other two adult tables. Well during my after Christmas shopping spree I found two amazing white wire Christmas trees at pier one that, complimented the branch piece perfectly. Along the way Tabby picked up a few other items that she knew would complete the vision but for the most part the tables were done. 

Top view of centerpiece

Bottom of branch centerpiece

Full view (these progress photos doesn't do this justice)

Pier One wire trees

Amongst, these areas there were other signature pieces that brought the party to life such as; the overall wall décor, an awesome back drop for the kids table, great food, desert table, mini glitter top hats, a hot chocolate bar, and a candy apple filled favor table (all to be discussed in my future post).  

Wall decor

Snowflake menu cards

Table accents

Favors

Candy apples

Signage

Overall nothing was missed and the all-white winter onederland was executed flawlessly. I just knew that with some many décor elements purchased I had to ensure that the month of January was spent pulling everything together. I set out with a goal for myself to complete one project each night; however it was imperative that all my crafting was completed before the first guest arrived at my home. As, I could almost guarantee that Baby O’s birthday weekend was going to be busy, my house was going to be filled with house guest (which I wanted to enjoy), plus she had her cake smash session, and the party. 

Fit Friday: Mango Chutney Shrimp Salad

Hey Luvs!

As I mentioned during my rant on Tuesday I would like to incorporate some fitness post onto the site. And, last night’s dinner reminded me of that thought. This is why I just had to share this quick and delicious recipe with you amongst other things.

The Recipe (This is a little something my coworker and I created as I walked out of the office yesterday with a craving for shrimp.)

Ingredients 

• 2 bags of Bumble Bee Super Fresh Lemon Shrimp with Garlic & Herbs
• 1 jar of Stonewall Mango Chutney
• 1 bag of Fresh Spinach

Instructions

1. Prepare shrimp according to instructions on the bag

2. Reduce heat and slowly add the entire jar of Stonewall Mango Chutney.

3. Stir shrimp and chutney together. Be sure to mix the two very well.

4. Remove shrimp from stove and serve over fresh bed of spinach. 
Like this....

My Fitness Story

By no means am I the typical person most would want to receive weight loss advice from. I've spent my whole life as a skinny girl who always ate what I wanted whenever I wanted. A collegiate athlete that really didn’t take my fitness and nutrition serious because, my God given talent had my back. Let’s not even talk about how I dropped my baby weight like a bad habit, and for the most part look like I never had a child. All that being said, my fitness story is more about feeling fit rather than looking it. I totally get that from the outside looking in I'm fit. Truth be told I've actually struggled with my mom body, I'm literally not used to the skin I'm in. How do I tell people this as a skinny girl? I don’t. Because, when I do most people dismiss the thought saying things like; I don’t know what you are talking about you look great. Girl you’re tripping. Ummm I’m going to need you to get over it. Or they’d simply rather discuss how they wish they had my body. As flattering as that may be it doesn’t change how I feel or the fact that since I was always the skinny girl I’ve never really had to deal with body related issues.

While pregnant I decided that I truly wanted to enjoy the experience. This for me entailed a few things like eating what I wanted (I ate something sweet daily), not exercising, and enjoying as much rest and relaxation as I could. In turn I gained almost 50lbs (most people couldn't tell but my doctors and I knew it was there lol) not realizing the consequences of my actions. Naturally, I figured I could drop the weight with no problem. However, I had no clue that dropping the pounds didn't mean it wouldn’t stick to me in all the wrong places (mom pouch). I had no clue my skin wouldn’t just fall back into place and I’d develop a skin related smut (small gut), and because of it I'd look at the physcial me differently. This is when I quickly learned it wasn't just a weight thing it was also a self-confidence thing. I'd heard about all this but couldn't really relate until now....I TOTALLY GET IT. Now, I spend my days trying to find my athletic spirit within my mom body, and it's a daily struggle. Most of the time I'm too exhausted to work out, and would rather eat something unhealthy. But, I’ve decided it’s time to go all in on operation fit momma. I just really needed to get creative so that I can put my words into action. That's why I'm hoping that by posting my fitness goals, progress photos, meals, workouts, and other tips and tricks I find here. As a community you all can keep me accountable for reaching my fitness goals.

Fellow Heartbeats...

You all are welcome to join me on this fitness journey by sharing your story and goals here as well.  And hopefully we can all uplift and motivate one another. If you are willing join me email me (externalheartbeats@gmail.com) the details on your story and I'll be happy to post it.

Mother's Guilt

I originally planned to do a transformation Tuesday post to motivate some, inspire others, and to down right keep myself honest and accountable with the whole fitness thing. Unfortunately, that post will have to take a back seat to what I'm about to say today.

As I write this post it's almost hard to believe that ust yesterday I wrote about how awesome my birthday weekend was turning up in various ways with friends. Now today I'm off work again and heading to the doctor with my external heartbeat. She's not her normal jovial self but, I'm not exactly sure what's wrong with my love just yet. However, after the day she had yesterday I've truly spent my night praying it's nothing serious.   

With that being said, this mom feels horrible, knowing that while her illness was developing I was out twerking at the national harbor (go ahead judge me I deserve it). I swear I have all sorts of Mother's Guilt (if that is even a thing) and have been sitting counting the things I would have don't differently had I known. Getting pissed that I didn't know sooner than her return home Sunday evening and wondering how I missed the signs. Telling myself I  not that mother who leaves their sick child to be someone else's problem while, reminding myself that I AM a damn good mom. My guilt is real and this shit feels awful. With that being said please pray for me and my baby girl because we are both feeling low today :(. 

Fellow heartbeats....

What's been your experience with Mother's Guilt and how did you bounce back from it? When the world beats you down you need to hear... You are a great mom. I heard those words from someone who barely knows me and it helped my heart.