Happy Monday Loves!
National Infertility Awareness Week ended on the 26th,
but after sharing Amanda’s story I received another story that is near and dear
to my heart so I just had to share with you all. I’ve known the couple you are
about to meet since my freshmen year of high school, yet it wasn’t until I
started this blog that I realized they had their own battle with infertility. From
the outside looking in their marriage has a solid foundation, and appears that they
are the perfect couple. You see them and think they are the cutest couple ever
because the bond between them radiates and you know they have the kind of love
people dream about.
So how could it be that they too have suffered from infertility? Find
out now by reading their journey below...
My Testimony
Hi. My name is Nina G. of Finding Joy inFertility and I am looking forward to sharing
my Infertility journey with you all. I have enjoyed reading Sheena’s blog and
Facebook posts about baby O. I appreciate her honesty, her sense of humor, and
her vulnerability at times. I recently contacted Sheena in regards to possibly
starting a blog of my own in the hopes of sharing my Infertility journey. After
talking things over with my husband, who is very private, he told me that if
sharing our journey helped me to heal my broken heart then he was all for it.
Yes, I felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest and beaten into tiny
little pieces. In other words, I was hurting in silence and refused to allow
this pain to consume me. I knew that opening up and sharing would not be easy,
but it would be worth it if I could help anyone who was going though a journey
of their own. So here I am, ready to share with you my journey of Infertility
during National Infertility Awareness Week.
The Beginning
My husband and I started dating when I was in the 9th
grade. We literally grew up together. We decided to get married in December of
2004, four years after I graduated high school. Through difficult times and
struggles we always had each other. We would talk about starting a family and becoming
parents, but we never imagined that it would be the hardest thing our
relationship and marriage would face. Infertile couples are three times more
likely to divorce. Sometimes, the void of not having a child causes so much
damage and strain on the relationship that the couple decides to end it.
Thankfully, our story did not end in divorce. The pressure placed on a woman of
child-bearing age can also take a toll on you when no one knows that you have
started trying and nothing seems to be happening. Early on in our journey, one
of my biggest fears was that my youngest cousin would have a child before I
did. Well, now she has two children and I am the only one in my immediate
family sitting here childless. I’m far from bitter, it just hurts a little every
time that it is not me who is sharing good news. I didn’t understand why this
was happening to me. I tried to do things the “right” way. I was married to my
best friend, I graduated with my Bachelors degree in Nursing, and I had a
career working as a Pediatric nurse. My menstrual cycles were normal, we were
both healthy. I just did not understand and started to tell myself that I must
have done something wrong, some how it had to be my fault. I felt like I was
being punished by God. Every time I thought that I was pregnant and my period
came I cried, every child’s party that I was overlooked made me sad, every
Mother’s Day I spent without a child I cried. Still, I hid behind a smile and
no one knew how bad I was hurting inside. I felt like I was slowly dying. I
felt like if I could just be a mom I would not care if I had the latest clothes,
the nicest car, or any materialistic things. I could have been stripped down to
nothing and I would have been overjoyed with someone simply calling me mommy.
Oh how my heart yearns to hear those words. I think I cried so much and so
often that my husband almost became numb to it. It almost became a part of who
I was. He probably expected me to cry because I did so very often. So we knew
that we would have to seek help in trying to find a solution to our problem.
Thanks for reading and don't forget to come back tomorrow to find out if there's a solution for Nina and her hubby
Hey where is the rest.. I'm crying so bad..:0 (
ReplyDeleteA Diamond in the ROC please come back tomorrow for more on Nina's journey
DeleteBeautiful story… I'm teary eyed! You never know what people are dealing with behind closed doors. I send nothing but Blessings they're way!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteSo true LaToya. I'm sure they truly appreciate your well wishes for them.
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