As I write this post it's almost hard to believe that ust yesterday I wrote about how awesome my birthday weekend was turning up in various ways with friends. Now today I'm off work again and heading to the doctor with my external heartbeat. She's not her normal jovial self but, I'm not exactly sure what's wrong with my love just yet. However, after the day she had yesterday I've truly spent my night praying it's nothing serious.
With that being said, this mom feels horrible, knowing that while her illness was developing I was out twerking at the national harbor (go ahead judge me I deserve it). I swear I have all sorts of Mother's Guilt (if that is even a thing) and have been sitting counting the things I would have don't differently had I known. Getting pissed that I didn't know sooner than her return home Sunday evening and wondering how I missed the signs. Telling myself I not that mother who leaves their sick child to be someone else's problem while, reminding myself that I AM a damn good mom. My guilt is real and this shit feels awful. With that being said please pray for me and my baby girl because we are both feeling low today :(.
Fellow heartbeats....
What's been your experience with Mother's Guilt and how did you bounce back from it? When the world beats you down you need to hear... You are a great mom. I heard those words from someone who barely knows me and it helped my heart.
