Wordless Wednesdays:What were your thoughts on this story? (comment below please)

National Breastfeeding Awareness Month

Hey Luvs!

I’m back from vacation and as much as I’d love to talk about my time in Mexico I’m not. Today I’m here to discuss a topic near and dear to the hearts moms across the country... Breastfeeding. This month is National Breastfeeding Awareness Month so I want to use this last week to talk about it.  To start I want to share a pro breastfeeding article that I found in my email this morning because, I wished some had shared this with me when I was nursing.

So here it is... "Why Breastfeeding Doesn’t Have to Be All or Nothing"

If I could describe my feelings about the upcoming birth of my fourth baby in, oh, four days (I’m being induced due to some medical complications) in one word, it would be this:

Fear. 

It may sound crazy because I’ve had three other children already, and one would think I would be totally prepared for another little baby, but in a way, having done this three other times, I’m even more scared of what it is to come. The sleepless nights! The weight that won’t come off magically when I give birth! The challenges with older children’s attention!

But the thing that is causing me the most anxiety?

Breastfeeding. 

I am dreading the thought of breastfeeding again. (Sorry, future baby, if you’re reading this, but hopefully you’ll understand some day.) I tried to explain my fears to my husband and it came out in a jumbled mess of mommy guilt and tears and me muttering something like, “You can’t understand what’s it like!”

Like it or not, he can’t understand my breastfeeding fears and, in part, that’s the biggest issue for me:

Honestly, it’s hard  to describe with others what’s it like to breastfeed and the fears associated with it but, this mom makes it a little better with here suggestions.  To read the full article and get some additional tips for success with nursing visit click here.

Vacation Nerves

Happy Friday Luvs!

I’ve hinted that I’m going on vacation but the fact of the matter is the hubby and I are headed on vacation...just the two of us without our sweet Liv. Like headed to an adult only resort where she isn't even invited if I wanted her to come :-(

We're heading out of the country for the first time since we found out we were expecting and my nervous are shot.  Although, I’m leaving my external heartbeat in the care of my trusted cousin Meka and huge local and extended support system it hasn’t stopped my mom-xiety (sure did just make up my own wordJ). Since my Motther’s guilt post we haven’t spent more than a night away from one another and that night she was still with her dad. So, leaving her for the first time has had made me nervous about so many things like...

• How are we going to cope without each other (I’m sure she’ll do much better than me?)
• Will Meka be able to handle all of Liv’s energy for the two days she doesn’t have daycare?
• Did I brief Meka on everything she needs to know about caring for my external heartbeat?
• Did I leave enough cash for incidentals?
• Does daycare have enough milk and diaper to get through the week?
• How will I communicate with my baby each day?

I know these things seem small and she’s in good hands, but the short of it is I’m going to miss my baby like crazy.

I’ve been planning for this much needed vacation for some time now (so I thought anyway). Then this week came storming in and there wasn’t quite enough hours in the day to get everything done at work, for my house, for my Liv, and lastly for myself.  And to top it all off my veteran mom Mrs. Tabby hit me with the unthinkable by letting me know now that I’m a parent there’s are few documents may want to have in place in the event of an emergency.  To which my response was...

• Emergency?
• Huh?
• What’s that because in my world those just don’t happen?
• I can’t see it. Don’t want to hear it. And you better believe I am not thinking about it. But, go ahead and send me a copy of the documents and I’ll take a look at them.

Just the thought of a hypothetical emergency left me on the other end of the phone hyperventilating but, the truth is she’s exactly right. And you better believe that I’ll be at my bank getting everything notorized this afternoon. However, it’s another friendly reminder that the day my external heartbeat came into my world it changed forever.  The care free do whatever, whenever mentality I used to have no longer exist, and my world revolves around her...I wouldn’t have it any other way though.

On another note these little unthinkable documents Tabby mentioned are the last item on my to do list so I hope that once it’s complete I can relinquish myself from my mom-xiety and enjoy a little fun in the sun. See you all in about a week J

Baby Hair – Olivia’s Journey

Hey Luvs!

Last week I started a segment called “Baby Hair” and shared a little bit about Liv’s hair and my struggles with learning to care for it, so today I wanted to follow up with a closer look into her hair journey thus far.  

Liv was born with a head full of gorgeous black, long, and silky straight hair. That Tabs and I affectionately refer to as her pixie cut lol. Seriously, it framed her little infant face perfectly but you can see for yourself below...

However over time and a few shampoos her silky straight locks became cute little curls. Giving her this look...

Both were super adorable and I just loved accessorizing them with any and every cute headband I could find. Now I can’t pay her to keep a headband on but that a story for a different day...smh. 

Anyway things with her hair were going exceptionally well until about the 3^rd or 4th month. Although, I had defeated cradle cap (get my tips here) my little diva loved her sleep. And, Being the first time that I am I followed doctors and the internet orders so I’d always lay her down on her back. This resulted in the back of her hair falling out and her having the smiley face look below.

I was devastated. Knowing this happens to a lot of babies I thought I had done the right things to ensure my lovebug hair would fall out. Clearly I hadn’t so, once again I found myself reaching out to my mom community of friends to see what I could do to fix this. The few answers I received were simply...

1. Give it time
2. Stop laying her on her back since by this point she was strong enough to rollover
3. Try to find some satin sheets for her crib

Since number 3 was virtually impossible to find, I focused my efforts on 1 and 2, and the back of her hair has slowly been growing backJ. See progress pics below and come back next week to read our current regimen.

Finding A New School

No wordless Wednesday for me today.  Instead I want to take a moment to properly address the thought provoking comment/question I received in response to yesterday’s post which you can read here.

The short of it is I was venting about my potty training frustrations as it pertains to Liv’s current school, and someone anonymously commented with the following...

“If you are so unhappy why don't you just leave now. No hate here, but it seems like you have been unhappy for awhile...”

This made me realize that I haven’t done what I set out to do with this blog. Which is to be 100% open and honest about matters of my external heartbeat. As anonymous stated I’ve been very open about my discontent with Liv’s existing school for some time. And, though I’ve insinuated that a change in schools is coming I haven’t quite shared the details. The crazy part about it is I feel like I did since all our family and friends have the inside scoop, and are looking forward to September 2^nd when she starts her new school.

Now! Before I proceed I’d like to apologize for taking you all for granted. By not sharing the details of the new school search. Anonymous made me realize that as much as I complain about Liv’s existing school, sharing the details of her new school is a post that’s long overdue.  So anonymous whoever you are thanks so much for the comment.

Now, without further ado here’s the long answer to the comment above.

It was sometime around April when I truly came to my breaking point with Liv’s current school. I can’t remember the exact straw that broke the camel’s back (it honestly may have been the whole potty or fundraiser thing) but, I knew it was time to leave. And if both my husband and I didn’t work full time or had family in our area willing to care for her, I would have snatched her out immediately. No ifs, ands, or butts about it, as mad as I was I would have made what I’d now consider to be a selfish decision and left the school without notice. Yes! I said selfish because in my opinion acting solely on my discontent (which in the moment I would have been), and not thinking about the best quality of care for her would have been selfish. In any case, I didn’t take her out immediately because our family dynamics didn’t support such a decision.

Instead after a year of her being in her current school, and receiving what I’d consider to be excellent care as an infant. I found myself back at the drawing board and in search of a new school once she became a toddler. Honestly, although I was starting to have my share of issues with the administration, my husband and I were also noticing how she had simply out grown their level of care. What worked for her as an infant just wasn’t going to work for her as a toddler. So, in early April I begin diligently looking for new schools in my area. By now you all know enough of my personality to know I don’t make decisions like this lightly, and I’m not about uprooting my child to leave her in the care of just anyone. I attended multiple open houses, randomly popped up at several schools, spent countless hours reading reviews, talking to administrators, and other parents of my top choice schools. Before we decided that this time around we’d give Montessori a try. Outside of the very docile environment that I’m hoping my little rambunctious diva will fit into we just loved the school philosophy. I loved the responsiveness and communication with the director and teachers. I also lved how even their so called “play” activities have a purpose behind them.

However, our decision to try Montessori came with a pretty steep contractual obligation. That further delayed us moving her out of the current school. The Montessori school we choose only accepts 10 or 12 month contracts which can only start in June or September and on top of that they are only accredited to take students as young as 18 months old. This is why our start date is September and wasn’t sooner. Through my search I found that even if I moved her somewhere else temporarily the quality of care would be equal or less than the care she is receiving today. So the hubs and I decided we’ll let her finish out the summer around her tiny friends and continue to deal with the environment that we know until her first day at the new school. Exactly, two weeks ago I gave her current school a little over 30 days’ notice that she will not be returning in the fall. And, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that the last few months of dealing with their shenanigans have been a serious struggle but, I’ve learned to keep calm and look forward to brighter days.

I’m pretty sure the new school won’t solve all my problems but, this mom is totally looking forward to a new set of experiences J

Somebody Is Obsessed With The Potty

And this mom can't do ISH about it...:-(

Yes! I'm over here pouting and my face is bright red.

If you read this blog on a regular basis you can probably tell that this is a very sensitive subject for me as mom. Since, I've known my child has been ready to be potty trained for awhile but, her daycare doesn't support it until she is 2 (part of the reason she's out of there in September). You can read all about that here

Any who, as of late Liv (peep the new nickname) has been obsessed with the potty.

• Like anytime she see's one she wants to stop sit, sit, and sit lol. 
• She loves coming into the restroom with me.
• She clearly responds to questions like did you just poo poo, or do you have to pee pee.
• She recognizes the potty

Just by those few examples you get the point but here's the kicker...

Over the weekend I took off her diaper in preparation to put her in the tub and got distracted with picking out her clothes for the week so she got to enjoy a little naked time (as my co-peep likes to call it).  Everything was going fine until she came running in  her closet and started grabbing my leg. When I looked down at her she points and says "pee pee mommy". At first I didn't see the pee so she grabbed as if she was going to lead me to a spot. But soon as I turned my body I instantly found it sitting just a foot or two behind where I was standing.  Can you say shocked? Because, I sure can. I couldn't believe it however, I calmly gathered myself and proceeded to take her to the potty and let her know that is where her pee pee belongs. If that's not a sure sign her tale needs to be using someone potty I'm not sure what is and I honestly can't wait until she starts her new school on September 2nd because even  if it doesn't solve all the problems I had with her previous daycare I know potty training won't be an issue. From day one kids are placed on the potty and is encouraged to be independent in that area.

But wait I'm not done. Let me add a little insult to injury by sharing a story from yesterday. 

In preparation for my upcoming vacation I'm working late hours so I got to Liv's daycare later than normal so when I got there her she was down visiting the little ones in the 2 year old class.  When I walked into this much larger classroom I couldn't see my baby but I heard her teachers voice so I followed the voices.  Only to find the two teachers standing near in the restroom. One teacher was changing another little girl and Liv's teacher was watching her sit on the potty (fully clothed). When they spotted me her teacher looks directly in my face and says "She's Obsessed With The Potty". To which the other teacher proceeds chimes in with "Have you considered potty training her? She ready and fits in this classroom really well." We had a brief discussion about the challenges I've faced as a parent with regards to potty training and having my child moved up and needless to say I left the staff speechless. DON'T PLAY WITH ME lol

However, as a parent I can't help but pray that because this school isn't supportive of potty training at Liv's age we aren't missing our window of opportunity. At her 18 month appointment last month her pediatrician informed me that if a child shows interest in the potty between 15 and 18 months its best to capitalize on their interest. As the peek ages for potty training otherwise, she may not be trained until two and half  or three. As we all know a month can make a drastic difference in a growing child's life so I let's hope my baby doesn't miss out because they'll be the ones I blame and send my diaper bills too lol.

Fit Friday: Mission Accomplished

Happy Fit Friday Luvs!

It’s been a couple of months since my last Fit Friday post so, I wanted to come share the progress I’ve made. 

If you remember my goals were;

1. Workout at least 5 days a week
2. Eat clean at least 6 days a week
3. Focus on Inches and not Weight 

• Waist – 26 I’m currently a 26 and started at 31 
• Hips – 40 I’m currently a 38 and started at 36

With my much needed vacation being a week away. Over the last 3 weeks I actually managed to stick to all goals (even with a heavy travel schedule over the last month) so I’m proud of myself. Especially, since this is what I’m looking like...

When I tell you that after having Baby O, and realizing what my C-section did to my body. I never thought in a million years I’d see abs again, I mean it. So pardon me as a gloat lol. My waist is now a 26 which was my goal J.

However, my hips are still the same which I’m totally fine with. I knew going into this that building muscles are something that takes time and this is a lifestyle change so I’m in no rush.

That’s all for me but I truly hope you are sticking to your plans.